Let no corrupt word proceed out of your mouth, but what is good for necessary edification, that it may impart grace to the hearers.
Ephesians 4:29 NKJV
One of the greatest lies we were told as children was that little rhyme: Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me. All the while we stuffed those slurs deep inside. We reminded ourselves that the words carried no weight, but if they were so meaningless, why do we hear them over and over again?
The name-calling doesn’t end when we leave the school playground. Once we discover the power of words, we begin using them to attack Those who have inflicted pain on us.
Unless you have been a life-long Christian, you may be quite skilled with the weapons called words. Let’s look at the verbal bullets used in marriage. Where there is a couple, there is conflict. An occasional marital spat. A strong disagreement where try as hard as you might, you allowed the sun to go down on your wrath, or at least your cold shoulder. Of course, it’s not just what we say, but it’s how we say it. Sarcasm and harshness rubs salt into fresh wounds. How many times have you engaged in battle before going to church on Sunday morning only to walk in with smiles painted on your faces? I think everyone has done that once or twice.
We would never talk to a stranger this way, even if they cut us off on the highway or rudely held up the check-out line in Walmart. Sadly, our spouses see the rough edges God is still working on. And let’s admit it, it’s hard to refrain from the battle when we are on the receiving end.
But we grieve the Holy Spirit when we behave in such an ungodly manner (Eph. 4:30).
Marriage isn’t only a union between a man and a woman. It’s a covenant between God, husband and wife. How we treat one another affects our blessings, our answered prayers, and our power from God.
In our focal verse, God wants us to build up with our words, rather than tear down. If we can’t say something that imparts grace to our loved one, then we shouldn’t say anything at all.
I am so guilty of meeting my husband at the door after a frustrating day at work with demands rather than a kiss. I am quick to point out what he didn’t get around to doing rather than paying him a much-needed compliment. I am learning that his crankiness flows from physical pain, and I just happen to be in his presence. That’s when I pray for my husband instead of reprimanding him for taking that tone with me, like I once did.
Ladies, I have found that my obedience to God has prevented many disagreements. It only takes one to pursue peace.
Therefore let us pursue the things which make for peace and the things by which one Maye edify another. (Romans 14:19 NKJV)
Heavenly Father, help us as husbands and wives to treat one another with tenderness, kindness, and grace. Shut our mouths when we are tempted to speak our mind, and cleanse our minds from those thoughts. Bless our marriages, in the name of Jesus, Amen.
DIG DEEPER
Let no corrupt word proceed out of your mouth, but what is good for necessary edification, that it may impart grace to the hearers. And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, by whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. Let all bitterness, wrath, anger, clamor, and evil speaking be put away from you, with all malice. (Ephesians 4:29-31NKJV)
HIKING THE TRAIL
According to the above passages, what grieves the Holy spirit. What pleases Him?
RESOURCES
If you are struggling in your marriage or any area in life, my new 30-day devotional will anchor you to God as you traverse turbulent waters. Overcoming the Overwhelming: Walking in Victorious Faith When You Don’t Feel Victorious
Originally posted on February 28, 2020 @ 3:00 am