Then He commanded the multitudes to sit down on the grass. And He took the five loaves and the two fish, and looking up to heaven, He blessed and broke and gave the loaves to the disciples; and the disciples gave to the multitudes.
(Matthew 14:19 NKJV)
Do you ever feel like you’re not enough? Either you don’t have enough or no matter what you do, it isn’t sufficient. Feelings of uselessness threaten to overwhelm your tender heart. Confusion clouds your thoughts because you had prayed about this. God is able to do exceedingly above and beyond anything we can ask or think, but not this time. Why can’t I ever get it right?
The emotion of inadequacy can stem from a myriad of situations ranging from insufficient funds to the inability to accomplish a particular task.
God drew me to the feeding of the five thousand after He didn’t answer my prayer concerning book sales. I get it God. I should have never requested a specific number of sales. They aren’t as important as transformations. But He blessed a fellow author. Why not me?
Today’s verse spoke to me. Before the five loaves and 2 fish were multiplied, Jesus had broken them.
But Jesus also blessed them. Actually, it says that He blessed the food before He broke it. Consider this, my friend, the bread was broken in the hands of Jesus. No better place to be broken.
Months passed as I waited for the blessing. When the blessing arrived, I didn’t even recognize it until I was doing a live message on Facebook. In the middle of a message on this passage, God gave me a revelation.
First, God had to break me before He could use me. Just like the bread and the fish, I couldn’t serve the multitudes until I was broken.
Next, I discovered He had truly blessed me before breaking me. The reason we don’t recognize the blessing at that point is because we can’t see the behind-the-scenes work of God.
God takes our not enough and makes it more than enough.
Lastly, I can serve the multitudes. Now you might say, “Carolyn, I’m not serving multitudes.” No, but the testimony of your broken to blessed experience will encourage others one person at a time.
I’m sure the little boy with his lunch that long-ago day felt inept when he offered Andrew his lunch. But can you imagine the story he told his mom when he went home that evening?
I don’t know why you feel unqualified to tackle the mountain standing before you, but God won’t let you tackle it alone. Perhaps you feel useless or incomplete, just hang on! God is taking you to a place where you will be more than enough. Trust in Him. Believe in Him because He equips you to do what He wants you to accomplish.
Seeing the blessing isn’t always possible until after God does His work. Then one day, a light bulb will go off, like during my live message. Then, friend, you will see the blessing, the brokenness, and the adequacy of your work.
Heavenly Father, I don’t always know when You are at work, but Your work is amazing. I thank You because You take me from broken to blessed. Amen.
DIG DEEPER
HIKING THE TRAIL
As a blind person, you can imagine the limitations I face, but guess what? Everyone has limitations. Mine are just different, and so are yours. Remind yourself that God will provide you with everything you need (Phil. 4:19).
RELATED RESOURCE
I’d love to welcome you into the multitude I serve. It’s not a large group, but it is filled with beautiful women, and I’d love to have you join us at A Mountain of Faith Women’s Ministry on Facebook click here!
https://www.facebook.com/groups/140942697610835/
Originally posted on February 26, 2021 @ 3:00 am
At times I still feel inadequate. It use to be so bad that my 2020 word of the year that God gave me was “Worthy” Over the 12 months of 2020 I focused on the fact God deems me worthy to be used by Him and for Him. Now in 2021 my word is “Restored” God is restoring my mind, heart and spirit now that I believe Jesus sees me as worth of the calling He placed on my life.
I am so glad God has delivered you from the feeling of unworthiness. You are a brave woman because you are an over comer. I am proud to call you friend.
Proud to call you friend to the other brave woman…you 🙂