I will praise You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
Marvelous are Your works,
And that my soul knows very well. Psalm 139:14 NKJV
“We can’t do your surgery, so we’re referring you to a deformity doctor.”
I asked, “What kind of doctor?”
I couldn’t believe my ears. Why did I need a deformity doctor? What was wrong with me? I didn’t get those answers that day. The doctor explained, “If we do the surgery, it will create issues, and you’ll need a second surgery. This doctor can do all of it in one surgery.”
I tried staying calm as a flame of anger began to burn. I endured pain for almost four months, and finally someone decided to take a full back x ray. Why didn’t someone do this earlier? Whatever they saw in this x ray shed new light on my problem.
I understood the doctor’s reluctancy to operate. I didn’t want two surgeries either, but disappointment flooded my heart.
I hated the word deformity. Even with my blindness, I had never been called deformed. Deformity sounded grotesque. I wanted to tell this doctor I am fearfully and wonderfully made by my creator and heavenly Father.
Tears ran freely when I got in the car. I sat in the front seat next to my husband, no longer needing to lie down in the back seat, thanks to the epidurals. It went beyond the deformity thing. I had expected surgery in two weeks and to resume life as normal by late January. Just when the finish line was in sight, someone moved it.
The doctor never told me what the deformity was. What horrible thing would I learn from a neurosurgeon?
Three weeks later, I learned something I already knew. I have scoliosis. Nobody had explained the severity of it to me until then as the neurosurgeon said, “Without a major surgery, your lungs and heart will be affected, and pain will increase.”
God has created each of us as His masterpiece. We live in a sin-cursed world with sickness that affects our bodies creating all sorts of havoc.
For we are God’s masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so we can do the good things he planned for us long ago. (Ephesians 2:10 NLT)
The Greek word translated masterpiece in the New Living Translation (NLT) is poiema and it means beautiful poem. This same word is translated as workmanship in the New King James Version (NKJV).
Let’s unpack our focal verse from Psalm 139:14. Wonderfully made means distinguished, and We are His marvelous works. Think about that. You are distinguished and marvelous.
I couldn’t see the curvature of my spine, nor the twist in it on the x ray, but after surgery, I saw my scars. I felt them, and I hated them. Scars ran up the middle of my back and stomach, measuring about eight to ten inches. After my gall bladder surgery, I received five more scars.
The spine surgery left me with an obvious abnormal bulge in my lower left abdomen. Even after a CAT scan, the doctors told me there was nothing there. It looked as if I was pregnant. I tried flattening it with tummy shapers. Whatever the nothing was, it eventually diminished.
I don’t know about your scars, the ones you see and the internal ones you feel. I consider them battle trophies now. Is there something about your body that causes you unhappiness?
We began as beautiful poems and masterpieces, but sin has left its ugly mark on us. As women, we care about our appearances. But one day we will receive our glorified bodies. We will be perfect without deformities, scars, or pain.
Perhaps your scars are invisible, but you live in agonizing pain or sickness. Don’t despise your body! It is the temple of the Holy Spirit
Walk through these difficult days with grace, knowing that you are more than your physical body. You are God’s masterpiece.
Or do you not know that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit who is in you, whom you have from God, and you are not your own? For you were bought at a price; therefore glorify God in your body and in your spirit, which are God’s. (1 Corinthians 6:19-20 NKJV)
Heavenly Father, thank You for creating me as a masterpiece. Remove all feelings of dissatisfaction about my body. Help me glorify You in this body, with all its flaws. In Jesus’s name. Amen.